Almost two months

Wow I can't believe that he's been gone for almost two months and now it's already time for him to return home. The first week he was gone was difficult and long but then the time just kind of flew by. The distance definitely didnt bring us any closer together like I had hoped but it amazingly enough helped me sort through my thoughts since I had nothing else to do. Lots has happened since he left and ironically enough nothing REALLY has happened... I guess i just feel like lots has happened because I have come to realize so many things. Life is too short to spend it wishing for something to change. I have never liked being the girl that bithches and moans about her life... If i dont like something I need to change it and if it cant be changed then it's time to move on! The next few months are critical, holidays sometimes overwhelm us and although it should be a happy, warm, cozy, loving time I'm kind of dreading it. I wish I would just sleep through the next few months and just wake up to find everything resolved and in its place. I hate not knowing what the next move is but there's only one way to find out what that will be, although the question I need to ask is scary and not ideal I need to ask it before i fall out of love and hate invades my heart! I've kind of been rambling for the past month and no one ever really knows what i'm saying including myself but I am so emotionally exhausted I need an outlet and I finally found one even if what I write doesnt make any sence I feel better after I'm done... it's a cliché but truly only time will tell.....